I Will Never Vote

This will be a somewhat serious blog. It will be funny in some parts, but I figured that it was time for an intelligent post. Don't worry, the next post will be the second episode to "The East Wing." Well, enjoy my political commentary even though I don't know shit about politics.

America has officially gone down the shitter. What the fuck happened to the sense of pride we had right after September 11th? It's almost four years later and the only thing I've learned is that The Who's "We Won't Get Fooled Again" is a kick-ass song. That was the only song I heard on the radio for 5 months after 9-11. Even the rap stations played it. Everybody loved Bush right after September 11th, now he's the world's biggest dickhead. He went into a war that everyone told him not to go into. He basically told the UN to shove big, black dildos up their asses. He put us into a war (mind you we didn't even FINISH the first one) for a reason that was false. Saddam wouldn't allow weapons anywhere near his country after the first time we kicked his ass. He was running the country with an iron fist. Sure, he gassed his own countrymen, but how the fuck is that our problem? We started a war to get higher gas prices and women's voting rights in Iraq and Afghanistan. Yeah, and that was worth the thousands of soldiers we've lost in the war. Can you imagine being the child of a soldier lost in the war, never seeing or knowing who your father was?

What's the other reason for the war? Saddam was hiding bin Laden? Bullshit. You wanna know who is hiding Osama? Look no further than our allies: the Saudi Arabians. Osama himself is Saudi, you douchebags in government. And you're saying it was Hussein? I didn't know that America was this stupid. The Saudis gave him a shitload of money (on top of the money he got from his father) and told him to fuck off. The CIA founded bin Laden and his "freedom fighters" in the 70's to fight against Russia. Wow, we support a guy who's going to bomb our country just so we can defeat our future allies. Nice job, shitheads.

That doesn't even piss me off that much. What pisses me off the most is that we jumped into a war before we even killed the motherfucker who bombed us in the first place. Osama has to make tapes of himself jumping up and down, flailing his arms in the air just to get a half of a minute on the news. HE'S ALIVE! If he's still alive, he's still a threat. Do you know how many crazy Arabs want to work for him? With the money he has, it's no problem for him to make a September 11th sequel. Another thing about the war in Iraq is that we attacked a country that didn't even have weapons, yet we negotiate with North Korea who told the world that they had nuclear (not NUKE-U-LUR, President Bush) weapons and the rest of the world can fuck themselves if they opposed this. Wow, what a Cracker Jack Government. A surprise in every fucking box. So to sum up President Bush, I think he's an asshole and I wish he's have flown on TWA Flight 800.

And John Kerry sucks too. He has the debate skills of a fucking Guinea Pig. He could have brought up millions of flawas of Bush's first term, but he didn't. All he did was remind us that the economy sucks and that Dick Cheney's daughter is a dike. Way to go, by doing this you lost an election that was impossible to lose. You're a fucking moron, John Kerry.

This brings me to the point that I stated in the title. I've never voted and I don't plan on voting. All of the candidates are full of shit. Sure, I had an opinion. I'd have rather seen Kerry in office than Bush, but if they both died in a hotel fire a week before the election, it wouldn't have affected my life one bit. That's why I didn't talk much about the election with my friends, because I simply did not care. Why the fuck did teenagers need to get involved in the election? You're not voting, dipshits. Nobody gives a shit about your opinions. When you get your voter registration card, then we'll talk. Until then, do what I do and stick to porn instead of getting involved in politics. I remember on the day of the election hearing a teenage girl on the radio say "If we elect Kerry, we destroy what the founding fathers worked for." Right. We all know that anarchy starts by electing an organized government, isn't that right you dumb whore. To the girl on the radio who said that, this is my reply: I don't want to see you open your mouth again unless a dick is going in it. Is he going to make abortions mandatory? I sure hope so if future generations of children are going to be anything like her. And why do Kerry supporters feel the need to compare Bush to Hitler, and vice versa? Hey, you dolts, Bush and Kerry aren't Hitler. HITLER is Hitler. Until I see footage of Bush building gas chambers in the oval office, you fuckfaces can suck a retarded boy's dick.

I read two political blogs, a conservative one and one written by a liberal. The conservative blog (thejessefactor.com) was actually intelligent and made me think that Bush might actually have an IQ in double digits. The liberal, (youngliberal.blogspot.com) on the other hand, did nothing but insult The Jesse Factor and reminded me that Kerry's supporters were also dickheads who should be shoved in front of a moving train. Young Liberal went grade-school on Jesse. As a matter of fact, calling his insults "grade school level" would be an insult to many Elementary School kids. Chris Bilal (writer of Young Liberal), I've seen better jokes on Pop-Sicle sticks. So needless to say, that blog made me feel differently about Kerry and his supporters.

Well, since I am not a Democrat or a Republican, I'm faced with one question: What do I do? Should I vote for Ralph Nader? Then I'm throwing away my vote because only hippies and Star Trek geeks vote for Nader, so I might as well not vote at all. I think America should vote ME for President. But that's not going to happen. I can hope for all of America to not vote one year, but there's more of a chance of Dat Phan becoming funny than that happening. But something needs to be done to show these dishonest pricks that they need to change their act. So I guess all I can do to protest is give up my right to vote in the next election.